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| July 4th, 2006
"Free At Last, Free At Last, Thank God Almighty I'm Free At Last" I was at the gym this morning and thought, "Oh, my God, I don't really have to work out like crazy if I don't want to." Yes, folks, after my appearance in the San Francisco Gay Pride Parade Gus Mattox is really, truly and irrevocably retired. The parade was great fun; I rode on the float with the big guys from Colt and some of the Buckshot fellas and even mr. Pam (in her waitress costume from Big Rig) and then spent a couple of days outside of Sacramento doing those pickups shots for the expanded edition of Big Rig I mentioned previously. (My rendition of looking under the hood of a truck? Brilliant.) Both experiences found me surrounded by old friends and colleagues and I had a wonderful time. But y'know what? I kinda sorta felt like a visitor. I felt like I was playing Gus Mattox rather than how in the past I've felt like--for all intents and purposes--I was Gus Mattox for the duration of the shoot or the appearance or whatever. This last trip I found I was introducing myself as "Tom" and at one point did, in fact, think, "What the hell am I doing up here on this float?" And even this blog... since I retired in March and, especially since tomjudson.com went up, when I write something it's been like I'm writing as Tom pretending to be Gus. Wacked, right? You'll get no argument from me on that one. So, whaddaya say we just leave gusmattox.com as it is today with its hundreds of thousands of words and gazillions of pictures and if you really want to know what's going on with me, mosey on over to tomjudson.com ("Gus's sister site", as I like to think of it.) That way I don't have to worry about updating two sites. Especially since--honestly and truly--there's no more Gus so I won't have anything to write about anyway. And that brings me back to the first sentence of this entry. Since I'm now just one person again I no longer have to strive to be hunky beyond my years. If I can pass for a trim, middle-aged man with some gray in his beard I'll count myself a success. I'm guessing the weights-to-cardio ratio is going to shift a little to the latter from now on. Oh, joy! But, I'll tell ya what: we're gonna go out with a bang here at gusmattox.com. Not only do I have a terrific caché of photos to post from the trip, I've decided that (being Independence Day and all) I will--now hold on to your hats--throw open the galleries on gusmattox.com to the world. For free! In honor of our Founding Fathers Ben, Thomas, George, John and, uh, Ringo. So don't ever say Gus Mattox didn't know how to make a grand exit. Toodle-oo!
A) I arrived on Friday afternoon just as the weekend was starting to rev up. Chi Chi was laying low in her hotel room to save her energy for all the events she had planned. I visited with her for a few hours and we just spent the time catching up and rehearsing for our road tour of Sweet Bird of Youth. (Y'know, that was a joke of course, but it does sound like a sensational idea, doesn't it?) S) This is the truck full of meat I got to ride with in the parade. D) Adorable Carlo Massi. So shy, that one. He started singing showtunes at one point and when he segued from "One" into "Over the Rainbow" I thought I had died and gone to heaven. F) Look at these adorable boys! It's Danny Roddick and Alex Chandler (with some old guy.) They're newbies in the business and could not be sweeter or sexier. G) And look at this adorable boy! This is the famous photographer Hudson Wright I'm always yammering on about. He was in town to shoot stills on a Colt movie that was about to go into production and joined the party at the float. H) Just to prove that other picture wasn't a fluke. C-U-T-E! J) mr. Pam showed up at an event the night before the parade with a jar of "slut cherries." I'm not exactly sure what made them that, but, hey... Z) Hudson snapped this in the detritus of the parade. Looks like a set, doesn't it? X) O.K., this is definitely one of the things I'll miss now that I'm out of porn. This was during a stills shoot on location for the Colt movie. Does it even need a caption? C) You'll have to scroll a bit for this one, but it's worth it. It's Hudson shooting Jason Kingsley. V) This is Matthew. He's from Oklahoma. He saw me at a café and went and bought a camera so he could get a picture of us together. I don't think I've ever been more touched in my life. B) Did y'all know Marcus Iron is really a garden designer? Well, he is and on my last day in town he gave me a tour of the Botanical Garden in Golden Gate Park. Look at this amazing... thing. N) Here's Marcus in the process of building a stone calling card. M) Adorable? Huh? Yes! Ø) Bye bye, stone calling card. Bye bye Golden Gate Park. Bye bye San Francisco. Bye bye porn. Bye Gus, been good knowing ya.
June 18, 2006 I told you I'd post additional information on what I'll be doing at S.F. Pride this coming weekend. Well, here it is... I'll be appearing--along with a bunch of other guys--at The Powerhouse on Saturday evening. Aw, heck, let's just call it Saturday night. Anything after 10 PM feels like night to me, these days (Old, remember?) But just dig that lineup, folks; Colby Taylor, Chris Wide, Luke Garrett, etc. Not too shabby. I just hope it's a meet-and-greet. My box dancing days or O-V-E-R! Ever since that last gig I did in Nashville, man. Whew! There I was in that fun nightclub with those fun queens. My music starts up and I walk out onto the runway. I'm feelin' the beat, y'know? I got the music in me, y'all hear what I'm sayin'?! I'm a lean mean dancing machine and the music is flowing through ME into the house. I AM the music! That's when some middle-aged lady sitting at a table next to the runway cups her hands to her mouth and screams up to me, "Dance to the beat, for Chrissake!" And... curtain; end of play. But I digress. Whatever the heck Kris Weston has us all doing I'm just going to be staring at those Colt boys. Jeez, they get me going. Here's the details for Saturday night. Then, the next day, at the parade proper I'll be joining the crew on the Colt float (sounds like an ice cream soda if you say it fast enough) as we wend our way down Market Street. Kris e-mailed us all wardrobe specs; the Colt men will be wearing cut-off denims while the lowly Buckshot men (that'd be Yours Truly) will be in khaki cargo shorts. Don't want us to get all mixed up together, y'know? The next thing you know we won't be able to tell the star-bellied sneeches apart from the plain ones. Heavens to Murgatroyd! I do love that Kris Weston, though. So I shall wear my khaki cargo shorts proudly and color-coordinatedly. Oh, speaking of curtain; end of play-type things, it turns out Colt, er, Buckshot, will be releasing a deluxe, enhanced edition of Big Rig, later this year and they asked me to do a couple of pickup shots for the expanded version. "But," I whined, "I told you I retired." I mentioned this to my pal Charles Busch and he said, "It's not like you're coming out of retirement. It's more like after Judy left Metro and came back to shoot 'Get Happy' for Summer Stock. I wouldn't give it a second thought." So there ya go. I will be in front of the camera one final time walking through a door or opening a beer or whatever it is they have planned. And, because of that, I'm growing back that itchy ol' beard I wore in the movie. Continuity and all... (Speaking of Chuckles the Busch, I'm going back into town tomorrow to attend his one-nighter of Die Mommie Die! for the Actor's Fund. Check out the cast. Oh, baby.) There should be plenty of photos to post when I return home on July 1st. As mentioned below, I had a bite with my pals Marcus Iron and mr. Pam. Will you allow me--for the hundredth time--to say that I met some of the nicest people in the world during the two years I did porn? These are two of the nicest of the nice. We sat at a cafe in Chelsea and laughed and laughed. I don't think I'm spilling the beans on this one, but mr. Pam has this doll named Glamour Pig that she brings on shoots. She poses Glamour Pig in the most unusual positions and situations. She rests the porcine cutie on various anatomical perches as it peers into assorted orifices and snaps pictures of said Pig in said compromising positions. Sounds fun and kitchy, right? Well, keep in mind that mr. Pam is a sensational photographer and cinematographer so these are actually beautifully composed photos. I keep trying to get her to cull the best of the lot for a gallery show and book (and greeting cards and mouse pads and calendars and...) She had the Pig with her at the cafe and we got a couple of snaps. They're from my camera so I feel OK in posting them here. And... I finally got around to watching Exposed, mr. Pam's documentary about the making of Buckleroos. It is the most amazingly accurate depiction of what it's like to be on a porn set (albeit a grand production on location) and I heartily recommend it to anyone who's curious about that (which would be every single person reading this page.) Marcus and Dean Phoenix come across as charming as they are in real life. And even though there are no sex scenes per se, it's really sexy. mr. Pam did a truly great job with it.
P) The luscious and lascivious mr. Pam with her biggest fan. O) This is just a vague, G-rated idea of the stuff that Glamour Pig gets herself into. Apparently, earlier that day Glamour Pig had given birth to a litter of babies. Pam showed me the pictures. They were, uh, vivid. Marcus assisted in the delivery. R) I mean, c'mon, look at this happy trio! The picture was snapped by Sean Love, our waiter that day. He was upset because his black shirt was linty. K) Later that evening at Splash I clowned around with Brad "I swear to God I have a law degree even though no one's ever seen it and I don't practice and, really, I don't take drugs even though it seems like I'm always cracked out" Benton. Trés adorable. Y) Baby's first cocktail. |
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June 15, 2006 Hey there, Kats and Kittens! I just got a phone call from Colt Studios asking me to participate in some Pride stuff in San Francisco at the end of next week. Honestly, I'm not exactly sure what it is I'll be doing, but Kris Weston is good at corralling us pornsters ("former", in my case) and leading us to where we need to be, so I'm sure I'll be just fine. (If I do find out anything specific I'll post it here.) S.F., as I've mentioned ad nauseum, is my second home and I haven't been in over a year-and-a-half (since I shot Leatherbound, in fact) so I'm a-itchin' and a-twitchin' at the thought. I have so many friends out there, and I just love the city itself. Plus, I have to admit their parade is a lot more fun than the one in NYC (which gives new meaning to the word "endless.") But there are two reasons in particular I'm looking forward to heading out west: Matt Cole and Luke Garrett. These are two fellers that kind of drive me nuts. I'll just come right out and say it: I'm a fan. Yes, I actually have a Hudson Wright photo of Luke on my computer desktop as I type. With one hand. I haven't met either of them in person before and they'll both be at the parade and, and, and.... (deep breath... slow down...) Well, you get the idea. I will be sure to post some pictures of me going ga-ga over those two boys. I'm going to be staying on for a week to catch up with friends (and meet new ones?) so, please, y'all, say "howdy" if you see me around. Just bend right down to the gutter and say, "Hey, Gus!." Speaking of men who drive me wild, I'm going in to the city tomorrow to have lunch with Marcus Iron. I developed such a crush on him when we shot Wet Palms last year. He's one of a kind, that boy is. The luscious Mr. pam is in town, too, so I get to enjoy her company as well. I hope she brought her rats with her. She and Marcus have got some kind of event tomorrow (Friday) night at Splash in Chelsea, so maybe you'll run into me there. Just bend right down... Oh , I already used that joke. Well, say hello, OK?
There's a new interview with me posted on plowed.com. You know how much I love to yammer on about nothing in particular... See ya in church!
May 15, 2006 The foxy sprite from England who edits the porn page for HX in New York kindly sent me a page from this weeks' edition of the magazine in which he reviews Big Rig and bids me a tearful farewell at the same time. And the foxy sprite from New England, Robert Richards, who is renowned for his beautiful drawings sent me a copy of the latest issue of My Comrade Magazine in which there is a portrait of, well, guess who? Me and five other pornsters, actually. Robert's drawings are so very beautiful and I was quite honored to be included in this mini gallery. He's one of those guys whose name may not be on the tip of your tongue but whose style is instantly recognizable. Remember Bob Peak, who did all those fantastic movie posters from the 1960s and '70s? He was another--like pornography, you know it when you see it. I'm in Philadephia right now, but when I get back home I'll put a scan of Robert's drawing here. If you don't know My Comrade (and you probably don't; it comes out once every five years or so) you should really order a copy. Les a.k.a. Linda Simpson is the editrix-in-chief and does a superb job of combining fun fag stuff with ultra-smart commentary masked as entertainment. Mark my words--two hundred years from now, you (well, maybe not you) will visit the National Archives and there, right next to "Common Sense" will be the latest issue of My Comrade. Of course it will also probably be the next issue, but dang if it ain't worth the wait! C'mon, y'all--support smart homos. Order yourself a copy, throw it carelessly on the coffee table and just wait for the oohs and ahhs to start. Remember when I said I was going to stop updating this site. And y'all believed me! Oy.
May 11, 2006 I'll be reading (or, rather, he will be reading) a short essay on my local public radio station about a favorite high school teacher this coming Monday, May 15 sometime in the 10:30 AM half hour. In theory, one can listen to it on the station's website, but last time I steered you lovely people in that direction half of you heard it and the other half heard something else. So, I make no promises but I will hope for the best. Oddly enough, when I read the other essay over the air I had just gone into a production of Cabaret. Apparently I should get more of these radio gigs if I want to get more of these acting gigs. Disclaimer: the idea for this current essay was stolen outright from cutie-pie/genius Mark Allen. Mark and I have been corresponding for a while now and we finally met in--of all places--the produce section of my local supermarket. If it hadn't been for the broccoli rabe we might be strangers still. May 8, 2006 Just one snide, whiney little update regarding the entry below and then I'll let this whole thing go, I swear. Just for the heck of it I did an ebay search and guess what? You can buy an old issue of Men Magazine with pictures of me in it. You know, pictures of me naked. And you can pay for it with your PayPal account. But don't you dare try to buy a t-shirt directly from me! And now I've shed the remnants of any bitterness I may have had. Ohmmmmmmmmm........ May 3, 2006 Well, ladies and germs, PayPal has caught up with me again. In their infinite corporate wisdom they have determined that I am ineligible to partake of their services due to the adult content of my website. Don't get me wrong--they should certainly be able to set any paramaters they see fit. But PayPal and ebay are the same corporate entity and one can buy some pretty dirty stuff on ebay. Color me "self-righteous" but in my book that comes under the heading of "hypocritical." Anywho, you should know me well enough to know that I'm not one to sit around and moan about stupid stuff like this, so here's the plan: it looks like the current crop of gallery subscriptions runs out some time around September of this year. When that lucky person has gotten their "adult" dollar's worth I'm going to throw open the doors of the gusmattox.com galleries and they'll be available for all the world to see. For free. For everyone. Including those mucky-mucks over at PayPal (who you just know sit around all day beating off under their desks while they think about naked guys.) Likewise, if you have a subscription that's due to expire in the next several months, don't sweat it--you'll just remain in the system after the expiration date. I'm feeling so Mother Teresa right now. As for the t-shirts and baseball caps? Well, I guess we can work something out in terms of sending a check if you want to order one. In this cyber day and age of instant gratification I can imagine having to write out a check will grind things pretty much to a halt in that department. C'est la guerre. Have a lovely day. (This lovely day brought to you by PayPal.)
April 26, 2003 A few quickies: Last year I was interviewed by Toni Schlesinger of The Village Voice for her "Shelter" Column. She came up to the cabin and we had a nice visit just before I headed off to S.F. to shoot a couple of movies. She has a new book, "Five Flights Up", that is a collection of some of her columns and the interview with Yours, Truly made the cut. I'm even mentioned, albeit obliquely, on the back cover. Reading through it I found a few friends who had also been profiled. (That scamp Charles Busch in seen reclining like an odalisque in his Greenwich Village atelier.) It's a charming book and (as a friend pointed out) because of the brevity of each chapter makes for terrific bathroom reading. Toni's making some bookstore appearances/readings. If you're around, drop by and see her. She's amazingly entertaining. She'll be at Barnes and Noble on Astor Place, NYC (Wednesday, May 10, 7 PM,) Modern Times Bookstore, San Francisco (Thursday, May 11, 7 PM,) and South Street Seaport Museum, NYC (Tuesday, May 23, 7 PM.) And here's a link to the book on Amazon.com. Mix, the Lesbian and Gay Experimental Film Festival has a cool fundraising project underway: they gave disposable cameras to various celebrities (I pass for a celebrity in some circles, apparently) and have said notables shoot off the film in said cameras. At which point said cameras will be auctioned off at an event for said film festival. As in, "What am I bid for Gus Mattox's camera?" at which point said attendees will lower their eyes and head for the shrimp. But it struck me as a nifty idea and I wish them the best. That "x's" above brings me to my next tidbit: I'm on the cover of the new issue of Men Magazine (June 2006.) It's a great set of photos and I'm quietly smug about the whole thing (although no doubt I will be [deservedly] ribbed about it at rehearsals.) I wrote the text accompanying the spread and as I read it over yesterday after I picked up the magazine, marveling at the wit and insouciance I brought to the subject with genteel, high-toned words and phrases such as "cock" and "beat off", I did a mental slam-on-the-brakes when I came to a "correction" made by Men's copy editor. This person removed an "s" after the possessive apostrophe after "Mick Hicks." As in, "Mick Hicks' photos." You can imagine my shock. I mean, we all know that a proper noun that ends in "s" takes an additional "s" with a possessive apostrophe, right? Can you just imagine what an annoying pain in the ass I would be as a boyfriend? Sheesh.
April 23, 2006 My Sister My Daughter My Sister My Daughter Well, Glory be! tomjudson.com is finally up and running. Well, up and limping anyway. There's something at that domain resembling a website. In fact, it closely resembles this website--my designer is egregiously limited in his ideas. But he's cheap. One of the toughest initial decisions one faces when putting together a site is what, exactly, will go on it. I'm now faced with the dilemma of what, exactly, will go on two different sites that have lots of legitimate overlaps. For example, my new column in Unzipped is by Tom Judson, but the subject matter (and the fact that anyone reads it at all) is closely tied to Gus Mattox. So where should it go? And should I actually keep two separate blogs as two different people? Will that seem egotistical, or schizophrenic? Or will it be just plain pathetic? Should they acknowledge each other? In "Looking For Mr. Goodbar" Richard Gere asks Diane Keaton if she's seen "The Godfather" and she says no. In the reality of "Mr. Goodbar" is there a Diane Keaton? Tom and Gus have appeared together in a couple of Soapbox pieces, so I guess I am (he is?) insane, plain and simple. Jeez, I'm getting myself even more discombobulated from putting this down in print. Let's just say that most of the new stuff will probably go on tomjudson.com, but since gusmattox.com has, oh, about a third of a million more hits it will definitely not be ignored. Speaking of those hits, how--how?--is it possible that tomjudson.com has any hits at all when it barely exists? Can spam e-mail be far behind? But you don't want to hear about my ignominious conundra, do you? You want to hear about... The Play. Well that definitely belongs on t'other website, so check out the blog page over there. Soon. I swear. It's actually called a blog over there. Not a Calendar. Or News. Advance notice: Chi Chi Larue (who, as you know, I adore) will be DJ-ing at Splash here in NYC on May 6th. She'll be coming from Philadelphia from another gig the night before. She's not busy enough--she has to take on even more projects. But go see her and say hello. For me. Because, as fate would have it, I travel to Philadelphia on--you got it--May 6th. This article about the International Male Catalog I happened upon is one of the funniest things you'll ever read. I swear.
See y'all on the other side of the tracks!
March 20, 2006 In a Blaze of Glory
March 10, 2006 So Much For That Running Joke... There I am standing at the bar at the GayVN Awards afterparty talking with Jack Shamama and Mike Stabile, the genius savants behind Gay Porn Blog and "Wet Palms" and a handsome gray-haired man close by catches my eye. He looked vaguely familiar, although I couldn't seem to place him, (which is not uncommon with my addled brain.) I said, excuse me, I apologize for not knowing your name but I think we may have met at some point. He looked at me, and with a slightly quizzical look on his face said (in a charming French accent), "Well, I do not know. Are you in ze bizness or are you just a fan?" I tactfully maneuvered the GayVN Award for Performer of the Year that I had won earlier that evening behind my back and replied, "Oh, I'm just a fan." Here's a quick picture from the event with my date Wicki Boyle (who's a journalist and who plans to write about the show for the Gay City News) and some guy, oh, what's his name....???? Kidding! It's my most favoritest co-star Mr. Tag Adams, of course.
March 4, 2006 I'm off to L.A. next Wednesday to lose some awards. I'm bringin' my camera so there will be actual photos of the humiliation. Check back late next week for those. In the meantime, here's a little pre-Oscar piece I wrote for the Washington Blade. It kind of threw me that there's just a tangential mention of Gus Mattox. I suppose it's a good thing that Tom's getting some recognition at last, but I felt like Gus was in the wings yelling, "Dip!" to spur me on. By the way, the column I'll be writing for Unzipped (beginning with the May issue) has a byline "By Tom Judson". But you all will know who that really is, right? It's like that movie "Magic" with Anthony Hopkins and the dummy. Uh, let me re-think that... February 3, 2006 It's award-losing time again! The GayVN nominations came out the other day. They were announced at an early-morning press conference broadcast live onto some queen's video iPod in West Hollywood as he stumbled home from an all-nighter all the while swearing to himself "this is the last time, absolutely the last time..." I, dear readers, was nominated for a handful of awards, thereby exponentially increasing the chances for my public humiliation as I am again passed over at the ceremony on March 9th. Alfred Hitchcock... Cary Grant... Maria Ospenskaya... to this list of award-losing legends we can safely add the name Gus Mattox. And speaking of awards, The Grabbys (the other gay porn awards) are given out annually in May, in Chicago, the same weekend as IML. While perhaps a bit lower in profile than the GayVNs, the ceremony itself is more of a production (and really quite fun.) Chi Chi Larue and Honey West are the perennial hosts and this year I shall be one of the Golden Globe girls (along with Rod Barry and Brad "I'm Not Really Strung Out On Crack, It's Just My Personality" Benton. Brad claims he recently graduated from law school. No one I know has actually seen the diploma.) I told Chi Chi that as part of the entertainment that night I should sit at the piano while she and I sing a duet of "Sisters". Just think of it--no matter which of us sang the line "she wore the dress and I stayed home" it would be a riot. Chi Chi was underwhelmed at the idea. And finally, you'll probably all think I'm full of shit, and I really can't blame you, but I swear it's the honest truth: two days after I decided to put the Calendar in the deep freeze I got an offer to write a monthly column for Unzipped Magazine. It's going to begin with the May issue and will be something of a combination of the Calendar and the Soapbox: to wit the blithering idiot ramblings that usually appear on the Calendar page but with a more formal structure. Remember that God who doesn't exist? Well he shore do keep his word when it comes to that closed door/open window bit.
Spine of Jell-O Sheesh! Can't a fellow just fade into the sunset without a whole production anymore? I've gotten a blizzard of e-mail the past few days since announcing the site was going into suspended animation. I mean, talk about guilt! And yes, it's all been flattering and yes, I appreciate every word and yes, the cat thought I was hard enough to live with before you all gave me a swelled head. So here's the deal: you are reading what we in the web design racket refer to as a "new page." It's a specialized term and I don't really know the etymology but in this case it refers to a page on the site where I will--from time to time--post things that may or may not interest you. Stuff like any new movies I have coming out or appearances I have scheduled or when that nasty infection finally clears up. There's not going to be a link in the navigation bar to this page (although you can certainly bookmark it.) It will appear and disappear randomly and may not have anything of substance to say for months at a time. Sort of like the Democratic party. You'll know there's something new on it when the "News" logo shows up on the homepage. The most recent entries will be posted at the top of this page. Class dismissed. Acmehousing.net lives! |
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